Cinematography, Through the Pan Glass, Part 7.

Cinematography-Film Through The Pan Glass Part 7

Previously posted on Reelshow Mag by Richard Dodd

Richard continues his unique and hopefully humourous look at the film industry.

Ok . Lets see who we can insult this week..

Sorry,. that should read…

”Who’s Job can we define this week”

I know this will land me in a lot of trouble but hey..who cares…Eeny Meeny Miny Mo..

THE SCRIPT SUPERVISOR.

Have you ever been swimming in the Ocean ..not too far from the beach, and suddenly the water starts to bubble and froth up..shoals of fish appear on the surface..a place they would never normally be seen…what caused then to do this you may ask.

At this point you really know the answer but have abruptly gone into total denial.

It is something big and nasty and eats you…and you cannot see it.

The beach, which until a few moments ago was a leisurely swim away is now seemingly miles away and between you and its safety is a shoal of frenzied fish…trying to get away from a monster that you know is eyeing you up for lunch..and you know the day is not going to be a good one.

That is the feeling I sometimes get when some stone faced harridan, clutching a monumental stack of files grumpily pulls up a chair beside you at your exclusive Director of Photography monitor and proceeds to settle in…within seconds your private and secluded space resembles a gypsy encampment, with apologies to most gypsies,..

The files are stacked on the floor, blocking your way, the ten scarves/sweaters are thrown over the back of the chair..the coffee cup…personalised.. is placed on top of the monitor and a mumbled statement that “it is impossible to sit with the Chatterati and do her very difficult job” is the excuse for this intrusion..

For Chatterati read Make Up , Wardrobe and possibly the Art departments, who have their own monitors. Which is also the place where the Script supervisor should sit.

Let battle commence…

Remove the coffee cup..A one pound/one dollar cup of coffee can destroy a $20.000 HD monitor in seconds..

Adjust the blackout curtain, which has been arranged for your own personal viewing.

Take a couple of her sweaters from the back of your chair and put them on the floor, out of your way, remove her pens and pencils from the place in the front of the monitor where you have carefully arranged your copy of the script/newspaper/novel or crossword.

Then introduce yourself..

This is also a good time to explain the ground rules..

Basically they consist of a number of bribes.

Coffee can only be near the monitor if it is accompanied by another cup for the D.O.P.

Chocolates are a given..and must all be soft centred.

If she wishes to join you under the viewing blanket during a take then a shower is a must.. on a daily basis at least.

No arriving smelling like a wet Old English Sheep dog..Hair must be dried in the morning.

There will be no recounting of the previous evenings revelries with the sparks and prop lads…that is not conducive to creative thought.or any kind of thought…And I do not want to know how much her new leather boots cost..

Be quiet.

Do not spit or chew baccy..

What is their job?

They seem to listen to the dialogue..a lot,..run onto the set waving a script..mutter about the timings, sharpen her pencils and scream abuse at the Chatterati in the next room for breathing too loudly when she is “Trying to do her Fucking job”..

This is of course my own prejudiced view..based on wide experience..some times the idea of being a sea monsters lunch is quite appealing.

Perhaps a real SS out there might like to give us another version of what the Script Supervisor actually does